Beautiful pictures. Beautiful family. I do feel that way, and it is true. Blogs are great for that. Telling you how it is, on the surface. Not many blogs tell you what it is really like. What the day to day is like. Some blogs will occasionally let something in here and there. Maybe someone was rude to a neighbor or some child is dragging his or her feet about a chore or something. Those are not real struggles. Not real family dynamics at play.
No one wants to put their real life out there for all to read. I don’t want to either. We all like to make it look blissful and wonderful. Most of us know that isn’t really true but we all want to believe it. Who doesn’t like to scroll down and look at happy, beautiful things and people?
I am not going to go into detail about our family and the troubles it has. For the most part we are a happy, content, beautiful family. We have problems and try and deal with them as best as we can. We are together. We love. We care for each other.
For the last few years two of my sons have been struggling with the whole growing up thing. I don’t remember things being so hard when I was in my twenties but really I was thrown into responsibility because I was a mother at 22. I chose to be responsible because of the child I was carrying inside of me. It did change me. For the better. I like to think I would have changed and became responsible and happy without a child but I will never know that now.
Two adult men well into their twenties have been making some very poor life choices. As a mother I am looking to myself and how we raised them for answers. I am very confused and sad and frustrated. I cannot for the life of me figure out the why of it. I love them. I was a stay at home mom. I homeschooled them. We spent loads of time with them. Camping, hiking, games, read to them for hours at a time. Open conversations, long discussions. Nothing and no one ever came before them. Not even my husband. We were not wealthy. They didn’t get all the latest and greatest toys or education and they never asked us for them. We lived in the country. They had pets. They were happy, well adjusted children. Went on to high school and did very well. Both received full scholarships to college. They continue to be close to us and each other. There was no death, divorce, or abuse. We loved them. None of these things equate to a ‘perfect’ child. There is no ‘recipe’ for raising happy, well adjusted kids. I never expected perfect children. I knew I wasn’t perfect. I never expected they would grow up to be unhappy.
So there is the truth of it here at this blog. I know we are a normal family. We have problems. We are working on them. I will continue to support and love my family. I will continue to show you parts of my life. I may at times show you a little more than what is just on the surface.